Wednesday, November 28, 2012

Just putting this out there

Most of you know that my last pregnancy was difficult.  I had thyroid problems and just felt blah about 75% of my pregnancy.  Well starting in September I started having some of the same symptoms.  I had blood work done and the doctor said my levels were in the normal range.  The only issue that concerned me was the jitteriness I had.  And when I get jittery I have a very hard time controlling my irritability level.  And I tend to blow up on my kids a lot right now.  So I looked up online and found that many people don't feel normal when they are at the levels I am at.  I made an appointment with my endo doctor.  She is hard to see and it always takes 2 hours of waiting.  I went yesterday.  Told her how I was feeling and she dismissed all I said.  Then she said well you know that after having a baby you can feel depressed, here is a prescription for zoloft.  UGH! I left frustrated and almost in tears. Why do doctor's want to treat everything with medication.  She is a specialist doctor and really has no business diagnosing me with anxiety.  I think I would have felt better had she said something like, I really don't believe it is your thyroid, but to make you feel better let's do some more blood work, and if that comes back normal, I would suggest you see your regular doctor and they may be able to help you more.

And what makes me more frustrated is my DH, I think, agrees that it is just anxiety.  Though he said while talking to me "that he isn't saying that it is anxiety" but he talked to his mom about it all and she said I have had a lot on my plate and blah blah blah.  Please don't misunderstand me.  I am a mom of four children, my oldest is six.  I do have a lot on my plate.  But the jitteriness I get was exactly the same as when my thyroid levels were low.  I understand people really do suffer from anxiety and I am in no way down playing anything that they are feeling or  suffering from.  I just honestly don't think that is what is wrong with me.  And to be just thrown aside like I don't know what I am talking about is frustrating.  And if it is my thyroid levels I only have two doctors kinda close that I could go to, her and another doctor in Tally. I may try to get a second opinion. We will see tho. I may just tough it out and see if it goes away when I am done nursing and my hormones go back to normal.

I dislike having anything wrong with me. I tend to just ignore it and believe that God will heal me from whatever it may be.  SO I will believe that I am healed right now.!